PsychWELLNESS – HeartyPsych

December 25, 2022December 25, 2022 HeartyPsych PsychLINKS, PsychWELLNESS

An Instruction Manual for New Parents on Newborn Care

After a successful pregnancy, labor, and delivery, you’re now prepared to take your new family home and start a new chapter in your life. However, after you get home, you might think you have no idea what you’re doing! You are acting in complete ignorance! Even the most anxious new parents can soon feel comfortable taking care of a baby thanks to following advice.

Getting Aid Following Childbirth

During this stressful and overwhelming period, think about seeking assistance. Speak with the professionals nearby while you are in the hospital. Many hospitals employ lactation consultants or feeding specialists who can assist you in starting to breastfeed or bottle-feed. Nurses may demonstrate how to carry, burp, change, and care for your baby, which is another fantastic resource.

You could choose to engage a postpartum doula, a baby nurse, or a respectable neighborhood adolescent to assist you for a short while following the birth if you need in-home assistance. Your doctor or the hospital may be able to direct you to home health agencies and assist you in finding information about in-home care. Family and friends frequently wish to assist as well.

Care of a Newborn

The fragility of infants might be frightening if you haven’t spent much time around them. Observe the following fundamentals:

Before touching your child, wash your hands or sterilize them with a hand sanitizer. Because they don’t yet have a robust immune system, newborns are vulnerable to illness. Make sure everyone who comes in contact with your kid has clean hands.

Support the head and neck of your infant. When you are carrying your infant, support the head and cradle it. When you are laying your baby down, support the head.

Never, under any circumstances, whether anger or play, shake your baby. Brain hemorrhage and possibly death might result from shaking. If you need to wake your baby, tickle them instead of shaking them.

Bonding and Calming

One of the most enjoyable aspects of caring for an infant is certainly bonding, which takes place during the delicate period in the first few days and hours following delivery when parents form a close bond with their child. An emotional connection can be facilitated by physical proximity.

Infants’ attachment influences their emotional development, which influences other aspects of their development, such as their physical development.

The presence of a parent or other responsible adult in a child’s life is essential for their development.

Start your bonding process by cuddling your infant and giving him or her gentle strokes in various patterns. You and your partner can also benefit from being “skin-to-skin” by cradling or nursing your infant close to your bodies.

Babies, particularly those who are premature or have health issues, may respond favorably to infant massage. Certain massage techniques may improve bonding and aid in the growth and development of infants. Ask your doctor for advice. Infant massage is covered in many books and DVDs. However, be cautious because babies lack the strength of adults, so massage your baby lightly.

The vocal noises that babies typically enjoy are talking, chattering, singing, and cooing. It’s likely that your infant will likewise enjoy music. Other effective techniques to boost your baby’s hearing include baby rattles and musical mobiles. Try singing, reciting poetry and nursery rhymes, or reading aloud while gently swaying or rocking your baby in a chair if they are being fussy

Some infants may be extremely sensitive to touch, light, or sound; they may also scream more frequently than usual, sleep for shorter periods of time than typical, or turn their faces away when spoken or sang to. Keep noise and light levels low to moderate if that applies to your baby.

Another calming technique first-time parents should learn is swaddling, which some newborns respond favorably to during their first few weeks. When done correctly, swaddling prevents a baby’s legs from moving too much while keeping their arms tight to their bodies. Swaddling a baby seems to give most babies a sense of security and comfort in addition to keeping them warm. Additionally, swaddling may lessen the startle reflex, which might awaken a newborn.

The Whole Diaper Story

Before bringing your new child home, you will probably choose between cloth and disposable diapers. Whichever method you choose, your child will need new diapers roughly 10 times per day, or 70 times per week.

Make sure you have everything you need before changing your baby’s diaper so you won’t have to leave your child unattended on the changing table.

Lay your infant on his or her back and take off the soiled diaper after each bowel movement or if it is damp. To gently clean your baby’s genital area, use a washcloth, cotton balls, and water. You can also use baby wipes. Boy diaper removal should be done with caution as exposure to the air may cause him to urinate. To prevent a UTI, wipe a girl’s bottom from front to back when wiping her (UTI). Apply cream to stop or heal a rash. Always remember to fully wash your hands after changing a baby.

A typical problem is diaper rash. Warm showers, diaper cream, and some time out of the diaper usually help the red, bumpy rash to disappear in a few days. The majority of rashes occur as a result of the baby’s sensitive skin being irritated by the wet or poopy diaper.

Try these suggestions to treat or avoid diaper rash:

As soon as your baby has a bowel movement, change their diaper as quickly as you can.

Apply a fairly thick layer of diaper rash or “barrier” cream after gently cleaning the region with mild soap and water (wipes can occasionally be unpleasant). The best creams are those that contain zinc oxide because they provide a barrier against moisture.

Wash your cloth diapers in detergents devoid of dyes and fragrances if you use them.

Allow the infant to spend some of the day alone. This enables the skin to breathe.

Call your doctor if the diaper rash lasts more than 3 days or appears to be getting worse; it can be a fungal infection that needs to be treated with a prescription.

Basics of Bathing

You should give your infant a sponge wash until the umbilical chord is cut, and the navel fully recovers (1–4 weeks)

In the first year, a bath two or three times per week is acceptable. Bathing more frequently could dry out the skin.

Before bathing your child, get the following ready: a soft brush to stimulate the baby’s scalp a soft, clean washcloth mild, unscented baby soap, shampoo towels or blankets, a fresh diaper and fresh clothing.

Sponging: Choose a safe, flat surface (such a changing table, floor, or counter) in a warm area for the sponge bath. If a sink or bowl is available, fill it with warm (not hot!) water. Baby should be stripped of clothing and wrapped in a towel. Start with one eye and wipe it from the inner corner to the outer corner of a clean cotton ball or washcloth soaked with water only. To clean the second eye, use a fresh washcloth corner or an additional cotton ball. Use the wet washcloth to clean your child’s ears and nose. Then dampen the cloth once again, gently wash the person’s face with a little soap, and pat it dry.

Next, make a lather using baby shampoo, gently wash your child’s head, and then rinse. Gently wash the remainder of the infant with a moist cloth and soap, giving close attention to the creases in the genital region, behind the ears, under the arms, and around the neck. After washing those areas, make sure they are dry before dressing and diapering your child.

Bathing in tubs: The initial baths for your infant should be gentle and brief when they are ready for tub baths. Return to sponge baths for a week or two if the person gets angry, then try the bath once more.

Burping and Feeding Your Infant

You might be unsure about how frequently to breastfeed or bottle-feed your child. In general, it is advised to feed babies whenever they appear hungry, or on demand. Your infant may cry, put his or her fingers in their mouths, or make sucking noises as a cue to you.

A newborn infant need feedings every two to three hours. Give your infant the chance to nurse for roughly 10 to 15 minutes at each breast if you’re breastfeeding. Your infant will likely consume two to three ounces (60 to 90 milliliters) of formula at each feeding if you are formula feeding.

To make sure they feed enough, some infants may need to be awakened every few hours. If you need to wake your infant frequently or if they don’t seem to be interested in sucking or feeding, call the doctor.

It is simple to check that your kid is eating enough when you use a formula, but nursing presents some challenges. Your baby is most likely getting enough food if he or she appears full, changes approximately six diapers, passes several stools, sleeps soundly, and gains weight consistently.

During feedings, babies frequently swallow air, which can make them irritable. Burp your child frequently to aid in preventing this. If you bottle-feed or breast-feed, try burping your child after 2–3 ounces (60–90 milliliters) or whenever you switch breasts.

Try burping your infant after each ounce when bottle-feeding or every five minutes when breastfeeding if they frequently have gas, have gastroesophageal reflux, or seem fussy during feeding.

Use these burping suggestions:

Hold your infant up straight, placing the child’s head on your shoulder. With your other hand, softly pat the back of your infant while supporting the head and back.

Place the infant on your lap. With one hand, support your baby’s head and chest by placing the heel of your hand on their chest and cradling their chin in the palm of your hand (take care to grab their chin, not their throat). Your baby’s back should be softly patted with the other hand.

On your lap, place your infant face down. Gently massage or rub your baby’s back while supporting his or her head, making sure it is higher than the child’s chest.

Before feeding your baby again, if they haven’t burped after a few minutes, switch the baby’s position and try again. When feeding time is finished, always burp your baby and then keep him or her upright for at least 15 minutes to prevent spitting up.

Getting to Sleep

If you’re a new parent, you might be startled to find that even while your baby seems to need you all the time, they actually sleep for at least 16 hours each day.

Newborns often snooze for 2-4 hours at a time. Expect your baby to wake up if they haven’t had food in four hours because babies’ digestive systems are too small to allow them to sleep through the night (or more often if your doctor is concerned about weight gain).

When should you anticipate your child sleeping through the night? At three months old, most babies sleep through the night (for six to eight hours), but if yours doesn’t, it’s not a cause for alarm. For this reason, if your infant is gaining weight and seems healthy, don’t get discouraged if he or she hasn’t slept through the night by three months. Babies, like adults, must develop their own sleep cycles and routines.

Baby should always be put to sleep on their backs to lower the risk of SIDS (sudden infant death syndrome). Other safe sleeping habits include sharing a bedroom (but not a bed) with the parents for the first six months to a year, and not putting blankets, quilts, sheepskins, plush animals, or cushions in the crib or bassinet (these can suffocate a baby). To avoid the development of a flat spot on one side of the head, be sure to rotate your baby’s head from night to night (first right, then left, and so on).

The days and nights of many babies are “mixed up.” During the day, they are more tired, while at night, they are more awake and attentive. Reduced stimulus at night is one method to assist them. Use a nightlight or keep the lights dim overall. Keep your baby’s conversations and activities for the daytime. Try to keep your baby awake a little bit longer by talking and playing with him or her when they wake up during the day.

Although managing a newborn may make you feel uneasy, in a few short weeks you’ll establish a pattern and be parenting like a pro! Ask your doctor to suggest services that can help you and your baby grow together if you have any questions or concerns.

Based on: https://kidshealth.org/en/parents/guide-parents.html

July 23, 2021 HeartyPsych PsychWELLNESS

Grounding Techniques for Managing Anxiety and Panic Attacks

Grounding techniques are some of the tactics that can come handy in managing anxiety attacks or panic attacks. These techniques can be performed by the person experiencing strong or extreme emotions or can be practiced under the supervision of a medical practitioner. These techniques have been found to relieve anxiety, panic attacks, urge for self-harm or self-mutilation, dissociation, substance abuse, and post-traumatic stressful episodes.

These techniques help a person get in touch with the present here and now experience. These techniques involve five senses which help him or her alleviate intense emotional states by using distraction and by bringing attention to the present environment.

Here are some grounding techniques that you can apply in situations where you experience intense emotional states or traumatic flashbacks. Some of these techniques use distraction, some use mental processes, and some use relaxation as a way to calm the senses:

Use five senses:

Find five things you can see
Find four things you can touch
Find three things you can hear
Find two things you can smell
Find one thing you can taste

The 4-7-8 x 4 technique (breathing exercise): It is simple yet powerful breathing technique developed by Dr Andrew Weil. Sit or lie down in a comfortable position, during the whole process, place your tip of your tongue lightly behind the upper teeth.

Inhale through your nose at the count of 4.
Hold your breath for the count of 7.
Exhale through your mouth at the count of 8, while making an audible ‘whoooosh’ sound.

Repeat the whole cycle 4 times. The 4-7-8 x 4 technique has been found to be very effective in alleviating anxiety and other intense emotional states by calming the mind, as it helps quieten the extreme and troubling thoughts.

Savor: Another grounding technique involves savoring the food or drinks as a way to bring your attention to the present. Take small bites or sips of whatever you are eating or drinking. Focus your attention on the texture, taste, smell, and flavors. Try to involve all your five senses in this experience.

Categories: Start thinking about a particular category, it could be anything like, food, places, names, etc. and then start thinking about things or items that belong to the chosen category. This technique helps by using distraction as a method to bring your attention to something else.

Focus on here and now: You can bring your attention to the present environment by focusing on here and now. You can start from stating your name, adding your age, the place where you live, date and time etc. You can also state the present situation, like where you are sitting, with whom or who else are around you. You can add just about anything.

Visualize: You can use visualization technique, where you can visualize your emotions as a volume dial and create a mental image of lowering your emotions by lowering the dial. Just like a volume dial on a radio.

Look for your strengths: You can ask yourself questions that can actually help you recognize your strengths. This will help you acknowledge that “You did it before, you can do it now.”

Sing: Sing your favorite song or poem. You can also chant a mantra. This technique will help you distract your mind from heightened emotional states.

Positive affirmations: You can use positive and compassionate affirmations to help soothe and calm your mind. You can say them out loud or in your head, whatever feels comfortable. You can also write them down as follows:

“You are doing great, you can do it.”

“You are getting calmed down.”

Plan: You can start planning an activity that you would definitely enjoy. Like, planning a vacation or planning a house party. Focus on each and every detail, like with whom you would like to go on a vacation, packing your luggage, making bookings, etc. Or whom you would like to invite for your house party, deciding the menu, party games, preparation, etc.

Remember! These grounding techniques cannot substitute professional treatment, but these can surely aid the healing process. So do consult your mental health professional.

November 11, 2020November 12, 2020 HeartyPsych PsychWELLNESS

Things You Can Do to Boost Your Mental Wellbeing

The importance of mental wellbeing and health can never be overstated. In fact, mental health and wellbeing is as important as physical health or we can say is more important than physical health. A healthy mind builds a healthy body. According to World Health Organization (WHO) “Mental health is defined as a state of wellbeing in which every individual realizes his or her own potential, can cope with the normal stresses of life, can work productively and fruitfully, and is able to make a contribution to her or his community.” Here are six ways to achieve or boost mental wellbeing. You can incorporate these techniques in your daily routine.

Mindfulness: Practice mindfulness daily. Mindfulness is a state of being in the present and accepting and paying attention to bodily sensations, thoughts, and feelings that come to your mind without being judgemental towards them. Make mindfulness a daily part of your routine.

Physical activity: Make some kind of physical activity a part of your daily routine. Physical activity has proven to be beneficial for your overall health. Do whatever you enjoy the most; be it dance, some kind of sport, exercise, cycling, running, or brisk-walk.

Stay curious: Curiosity is the key to all kinds of inventions that we see around us. Curiosity keeps the brain healthy. Observe things around you, try to notice anything unusual, focus your attention on everything that you observe, try to find why and how things are as they are. It will help you observe your feelings and thoughts as well as will help you manage them more effectively and in a healthy way.

Meet people: Invest your time and effort in building social connections with people around you. Socialize as much as possible. Man is a social animal; he needs to be surrounded by people if not all the time. Having social connections makes your life more enriching and will be a source of happiness. Socialize with people you work with, your neighbors, relatives, etc.

Be kind: Be kind to others around you. Kindness costs nothing but fills you with a sense of positivity and happiness that is everlasting. Help others. Make it a part of your daily activity to help at least one person daily be it a friend or stranger. You can even enroll yourself in some community service as well. You will be amazed by the effects of being kind to others.

Learn something new: Your brain is just like any other muscle in your body. It needs exercise to stay active and healthy. One way to keep your brain healthy is to make sure you never stop learning. Try something new, may be a new dish, engage in some hobbies, or enroll yourself in some course. Read biographies, learn new instruments or whatever you enjoy. You will gain confidence by learning new things.

November 1, 2020 HeartyPsych PsychWELLNESS

How to Build Confidence in Your Child: 10 Simple Ways

A confident child is a successful adult of tomorrow, who is better able to deal with the challenges of life and better able to bounce back from failures. Confidence is something that comes from within—it is something related to how you feel about yourself; and not that you can put on. A child who is confident is comfortable in his or her own skin and knows his/her self-worth. A confident child is always open to learning and gaining new experiences and is at ease in interacting with others, and is thus able to form good personal relationships as well. It is true that children should learn to face failures as failures build resilience, but the downside of it is that too many failures can hit the confidence-level of your child negatively; success definitely helps build more confidence. So as a parent, it is very important to provide ample opportunities where a child can experience success while dealing with challenges. This, however, can only happen when parents know how to provide appropriate support to their child, without being overprotective. A healthy self-confidence can, hence, be achieved only when the child experiences adequate success and when he or she knows how to handle failures. The best thing about confidence is that, it is not static or permanent; it can develop and grow, and parents can play a pivotal role in helping kids become more confident. Here are few ways that can help you build confidence in your child.

1. Believe in your child: Confidence is all about having belief in oneself, in one’s ability to accomplish things. A child who has a strong belief in his or her abilities is more likely to succeed in challenging situations and success, as we know, in turn, raises self-confidence. But this self-belief does not arise on its own, it is the result of having faith, as a parent, in your child’s abilities. So start by showing faith in your child, as this will in turn help your child gain healthy self-belief.

2. Assign responsibilities: Another way to help your child gain confidence is by giving them responsibilities like helping you in daily chores or taking care of pets etc. This, in turn, increases a child’s sense of self-worth, which in turn affects his or her self-confidence. When a child is given a responsibility, he or she feels needed and important. This sense of positive self-worth enhances the confidence level of your child.

3. Start coaching: Instead of being a controlling parent start being a coach to your child. Your job as a parent is to provide ample opportunities for learning, growing and developing. Start working with your child as a coach rather than as an in-charge doing things for your child yourself. You need to stop being a controlling parent and give some space to your child to let him/her learn on his/her own. Your approach should be like that of a sports coach, who only trains the player and does not play himself on the player’s behalf.

4. Be open to your child’s opinions: As a good parent, you must learn to accept and respect your child’s opinions. This gives a strong message to the child that his/her thoughts, ideas, and beliefs matter and have value. This also conveys that their views are respected. Involve your child in simple decision-making activities, like deciding on the location of your next family vacation or involving them in deciding house rules. And remember to respect their opinion no matter how absurd they might sound at first. You can always reason with them. This will also give your child a sense of power.

5. Encourage: As a parent you should always encourage your child to try new things and take on new challenges. This will help your child to master new skills which will, in turn, enhance his or her confidence. So, healthy parenting means providing opportunities where your child can learn new things and skills.

6. Appreciate your child: Whether your child succeeds or fails at an attempt, keep appreciating the efforts. The child should never feel ashamed of his attempts. When you start appreciating the efforts, your child will feel motivated to try again even if he or she fails in his earlier attempts. Your criticism will only discourage your child to try after a failure. So to raise a confident child it is important for a parent to focus on encouraging and appreciating the efforts.

7. Set achievable goals: As mentioned earlier, success helps build confidence and failures affect confidence negatively. So in order to raise a confident child, it is important to set goals that are achievable for the child. This is even more critical when your child tries something new. Success will help your child try and learn new things in future.

8. Don’t rescue but work with them: Sometimes parents are faced with situations where they are faced with the dilemma of whether to come forward and rescue their child from the failures that are imminent or to let him face them on his own. Well, studies have shown that children of the parents who let them face the consequences or failures as learning experience feel unworthy of love; they consider themselves as failures and often feel that their parents don’t care about them. On the other hand, the parents who come forward to save their children from facing the failures or consequences, raise kids who always avoid or run from challenges. Thus, the best thing you can do as a parent is to work with your children, not for them. Help them organize their ideas and plans, but the execution of such plans should be left to them.

9. Keep your worries to yourself: When a child feels that his parents are worried, he/she tends to interpret this worry as his/her parents’ lack of confidence in their abilities. This parental worry is often perceived as lack of faith on parents’ part. Thus, it is important for you as a parent to keep your worries to yourself.

10. Take interest: Be interested in the activities of your kids. Your genuine interest in what they do will make them feel worthy. Asking them about what they are doing is a good way to show interest. Your positive attention to your child’s activities will have a lasting impact on his or her confidence-level.

May 6, 2020 HeartyPsych PsychWELLNESS

Life after Lockdown: Don’t Let Your Guard Down Just Yet

As countries begin easing out lockdown, we are entering a world of new normal. If you think your life is going to be just like it used to be before the COVID-19 pandemic hit the country, you are probably mistaken. The researchers are trying hard to develop a safe and effective coronavirus vaccine as quickly as possible. But meanwhile, we need to be extra careful and be mentally, emotionally, and physically prepared to manage life amid coronavirus scare. This definitely entails drastic changes in our daily routines and habits, and at the same it requires some constant and continued efforts on our part as well. Here are a few things that we have to keep in mind as we now enter the post-lockdown phase. But before that let’s first remind ourselves that the purpose of lockdown, among other things, was to raise public-awareness about how grave the COVID-19 situation is. Therefore, even after the lockdown gets over, we cannot let our guard down just yet because the virus is still around.

Frequent reminders: As the lockdown ends, we are going back to our jobs and businesses. So we are now bound to spend more time outside our house, working, commuting, etc. As the activities become regular and part of our daily routine, complacency may set in leading to carelessness in following the health guidelines in all seriousness. We may no longer wash our hands as frequently as before or may overlook wearing mask or observing personal distancing while talking to our co-worker. This could increase our chances of exposure to the virus. Therefore, what we need is constant reminders. Placing sticky notes on your computer at work-place for reminding you of staying safe by wearing face-mask, gloves, or using sanitizer, can be of great help in this regard. Make sure that these reminders are conspicuous enough to grab your attention.

The office-management should place such reminders at various places in the office, such as on every table of the office canteen, inside and outside common restroom, at the entry and at each employee’s desk. You can also set wallpaper on your phone and computer to remind you of following the preventive measures set by the health department.

Herd-Behavior: Once you go out to work after lockdown, you are at risk of falling prey to a behavioural pitfall called herd-behavior, which could be more dangerous if you are surrounded by people who are a bit easy-going. Herd behaviour is a phenomenon where an individual’s thoughts and behaviors get aligned to what majority of the group thinks or behaves. Being aware of this phenomenon will help you stick to your beliefs and actions and maintain healthy behavior. Challenging herd behavior will require recognition of the phenomenon and being ready to stand out.

A new normal: Post-lockdown, you are going to enter a world of new normal where you have to greet your colleagues and seniors at work-place from a distance and without a handshake; you have to stop touching your face to avoid infection; and you have to limit socializing with your family and friends. All of these are easier said than done because these are habits that we have acquired over a long period of time and making a change in them requires a constant effort. However, until there is any cure for corona, we have no other way but to accustom ourselves to this new normal. During this phase, we might also have to add an activity or two, to our daily routine, such as taking a second bath as we come back home from office, before joining our family members. Remember all this will take time to become part of our daily repertoire, so a few slip-ups are bound to happen, which could add embarrassment to the self or bring quick judgement from others. Don’t let it affect you and cause anxiety. Remember! a habit takes on an average two months to form. So don’t let a few goof-ups derail you or demoralize you.

Don’t get offended: We also need to be more accepting of our friends and relatives who turn down our offer of a quick meet-up in order to maintain social distance. Don’t criticize them for being overly cautious. Remember! when your friend or a family member chooses to maintain distance from you, it is not just for his or her own safety, rather it shows the concern for your safety as much. So, next time when your office colleague wishes to sit on a table at some distance from yours for lunch, don’t get offended; rather appreciate and respect his wish to maintain social distancing. Don’t let this temporary phase affect your permanent and long-term relationships with your colleagues, friends, and family members.

Beware of the Health-Belief Model of Perceived Susceptibility: You also need to be aware of the health-belief model that prevents people from following a healthy lifestyle or giving up a risky health behavior (smoking, drinking, etc) even though a competing evidence is present, as they believe that they somehow are not at risk or it cannot happen to them. The same goes for coronavirus situation too. Therefore, don’t let this belief set in that you probably will not get COVID-19. You will have to constantly challenge this belief and remind yourself of this belief model.

Follow the Health-Belief Model of Perceived Severity: There is another health-belief model of perceived severity which suggests that individuals who perceive a given health problem as serious are more likely to engage in behaviors that prevent health problems from taking place. Accordingly, if you keep considering coronavirus a serious health condition, you will probably engage in behaviors that prevent it from occurring.

Don’t panic, take responsibility instead: Now that the lockdown is gradually being lifted in various parts of the world, the responsibility of fighting this pandemic lies with you. At present, you are the controller of the behavioral choices you make and it is up to you whether you choose to follow the government advisories or not. This is the time to show your real self. Take this responsibility with full determination and don’t panic. Believe that you have every control over the situation as long as you follow the guidelines. Having a sense of control will prevent undue worry, stress, and anxiety. Remember! post-lockdown, the control lies with you.

Don’t neglect: As we fight this deadly pandemic, we might be neglecting some other health conditions that warrant our equal attention. Psychological impact of COVID 19 alone requires a great deal of attention and need to be addressed as soon as possible. Anxiety, panic attacks, depression, risk of self-harm, and even post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) are some of the common outcomes of any natural disaster, COVID-19 being no exception. Some of you might have postponed your regular visit to your physician at the cost of your physical well-being. Whatever may be the case, it is imperative that you seek professional help to deal with your psychological or physical issues in order to ensure that your mental and physical health doesn’t suffer amid this COVID -19 crisis.

May 3, 2020 HeartyPsych PsychWELLNESS

How to Maintain a Healthy Relationship with your Spouse During Coronavirus Lockdown

Since we all are under lockdown, we are spending a lot of time with our spouse. This can be a welcome change for some but for some it can be quite stressful too. There are plenty of data to suggest that divorce rates increase during natural disasters. On the other hand, these may also be times when a much stronger bond can be formed between a couple. Here are a few tips that can help you maintain a healthy relationship, especially during lockdown, and form an even stronger bond with your partner:

Share the load: Share the burden of domestic work and any other daily work as much as you can, and in whichever way you can. It will not only lower the physical burden of your spouse but it will also make him/her feel loved.

Spend gadget-free time: As we all are at home, we are spending too much time on gadgets, mobiles, tablets, TVs, etc. To maintain a healthy and sound relationship with your partner, it is important that both of you spend at least some quality time together without these gadgets around.

Communicate: During such difficult and stressful times, it becomes even more important that you keep communication open. Share your concerns and worries with each other. Communicating your worries and concerns with your spouse will not only make them feel wanted, but you may find a solution to them too. You may also find that many of your worries are not even valid.

Get alone time: This lockdown has caused major disturbances in our daily routines. We are getting very less or no time at all for ourselves. We are surrounded by our family members, all the time, which is not a bad thing though, but getting no alone time can also lead to stress. The stress, in turn, can cause sudden emotional outbursts which can spoil the harmony between the partners. So to maintain a healthy relationship, it is important that we spend some time with ourselves as well, by reading or listening to music of our own choice. It will help us stay energized and refreshed. Stay together but give each other some space as well.

Find common interests: Find things that are of interest to both of you. Maybe you both enjoy watching movies or you both love to cook. Find out things where you can work together as a team, play cards, solve puzzles, etc. Games not only help you stay mentally and physically active and healthy, but they also build team spirit. Find games that need collective efforts.

Appreciate: Appreciation is a way to convey to the other person that his or efforts are acknowledged and respected. During this COVID-19 situation, it is vital that you keep appreciating the efforts of your partner no matter how small they are. Thank your partner for doing laundry, preparing food, or going out to buy essentials with full conviction. Your appreciation will definitely increase their motivation.

Practice patience and compassion: This phase also requires that you maintain patience and show compassion toward your partner. Let go of his/her small mistakes and try to overlook such habits that you don’t like. Now is the time to be sensitive to the feelings of the other person. Be a little patient and take your partner’s perspective into consideration before reacting. Remember these are extraordinary circumstances, which require extraordinary efforts on our part.

Be creative: Find creative ideas to keep the love and affection alive in your relationship. Arrange a romantic candle-light dinner or a romantic movie date with your spouse at home. Bring in all the creativity that you can, to make your partner feel loved.

April 23, 2020April 23, 2020 HeartyPsych PsychWELLNESS

How to Stay Positive During Lockdown

The whole world is going through an extraordinary phase. The present COVID-19 pandemic and the resulting lockdown is causing a great deal of uncertainty and doubt that might be ultimately affecting your mental health negatively. During this phase it becomes even more imperative to remain positive and take care of your mental health. Here are few ways in which you can stay positive during these trying times.

Limit your news intake: First of all you need to moderate your intake of news. There is no doubt that watching news seems to be the only way to stay updated regarding the COVID-19 pandemic. But, watching too much news can be overwhelming and can cause a good deal of stress. If you feel stressed and anxious after watching news, it’s a sign that you need to limit excessive news consumption. You can make a point to watch news only twice or thrice a day, to stay up-to-date. Moreover, it is important that you follow only authorised and reliable sources of information. It is important to stay alert but no reason to stay alarmed all the time.

Follow a routine: If you are working from home or have kids who are attending online classes, it becomes even more important that you follow a routine so that you get proper time for all the activities and don’t unnecessarily get overwhelmed with all the tasks and activities at hand. Moreover following a routine will make you feel more in control of the situation and it will help you normalize the not-so-normal circumstances that the whole world is going through. You can make a To-Do list to organize work or maintain a dairy or journal of the tasks to be completed. Allocate time to work, exercise, rest, etc judiciously.

You are not alone: Remember, that you are not alone in this, everyone is going through almost the same situation. The only difference is how everyone is responding to these circumstances and no single way can be considered perfect. Do what suits you best.

Exercise, eat healthy, and sleep well: It has become even more critical during this lockdown that you eat a healthy diet and exercise daily. As per health officials, a healthy adult is required to perform 2.5 hours of exercise per week. Exercise has been found to have various health benefits, like it helps maintain healthy cognitive functions, and helps reduce stress, anxiety, and depression by releasing feel-good hormones like endorphins. It is equally important to follow a healthy balanced diet. Avoid food that has too much fat and sugar content, avoid packed food that is filled with preservatives. Eat fresh fruits and vegetables regularly. Last but not the least, make sure you get 7-8 hours of sound sleep. Following a healthy balanced diet and exercising daily along with a sound sleep will boost your immunity and help you stay active.

Meditate: Meditation has been found to relieve stress and anxiety. It can also relieve depressive feelings. Just a few minutes spent on meditation can have a huge positive impact on you mental, physical and emotional health. Make it a point to spend few minutes daily on meditation. Find a quiet place where you can place a comfortable seat, make sure that the temperature of the room is neither too hot nor too cold, wear comfortable loose fitting clothes, and ensure the lighting of the room is not too bright. You can also add other elements like, a candle or aroma diffuser if you want. The purpose is to create a happy and comfortable space.

Practice mindfulness: Mindfulness refers to being present in the moment. Not thinking about the past or future, just being aware of the present moment non-judgementally. You can be mindful while cooking, eating, or even while sitting in your balcony. You can start practicing mindfulness by noticing things you can touch, see, and hear. Simply pause for a while and focus your attention on objects you can touch, see, and hear in your present environment. Close your eyes and take a few deep breaths. Notice how your body reacts to deep breathing. While eating or cooking, use all of your five senses to notice how the food looks, smells, tastes, and touches like. These are some of the ways you can be mindful while performing your regular activities.

Stay in touch with your family and friends: While we all are basically locked up in our homes, this does not mean that you cannot meet your family or friends virtually. Stay in touch with your family members and friends by calling them up or having a video chat. Don’t let the lockdown cause loneliness. Stay connected with people around you virtually. Man is a social animal, and therefore, keeping in touch with others is vital for your mental and emotional wellbeing.

Break the monotony: The lockdown has already put a halt on a lot of our usual activities. We all are confined to our houses, so it is natural to experience monotony in our day-to-day activities. It, therefore, becomes even more important that we do not let monotony set in. If you are spending a lot of time on Netflix or Facebook and still not feeling entertained much, or feeling rather bored, it’s time to take a break and do something else—read a book, take a walk indoor, talk with your kids or partner. You can also break the monotony by simply changing your bed-sheets, trying some new dishes, going through old family album, redecorating your house, or by organizing your forever messy wardrobe. Who said there’s a rule where you can’t dress up for home or you have to use your finest crockery only for guests. Arrange a candle light dinner for your partner or family members, dress up, use your finest crockery and have a restaurant like feel at home. You might have to compromise on food, but who cares. The point is to create memories and moments that you can cherish when the pandemic is over.

Gratitude: No matter how difficult the present situation seems, there is still plenty to be grateful for, if you look properly. When there are people who are struggling to survive in shelter homes, when people are barely getting enough to eat—in such times, if you are getting three meals a day, have roof over your head, and loved ones who care for you, you have enough to be grateful for. Think about it—on the one hand, there are frontline workers who are risking their lives to save others and on the other, there is you who can stay safe indoor. If you bring all this to your consciousness, you would definitely experience a sense of gratitude. The feeling of gratitude will, in turn, help you overcome all your stresses and worries resulting in contentment, which will bring to you peace and satisfaction.

Help your community: It has been proven that helping others makes one feel positive and capable. In whatever little ways you can, try to help your community, maybe by giving food or other essentials to the needy (while taking all the necessary precautions and maintaining a safe distance), by appreciating the healthcare and other frontline workers, or even by following the directions of the state government. You can also help you community by just being kind to each other. In these difficult times, everyone is going through a lot, so simple gesture of kindness can bring positivity not only into your life but also into the lives of others.

Don’t think about future, prepare for the future: As we all are going through this stressful phase, there must be many who are fearing possible layoff in the near future. Already a lot of companies have started downsizing their work force. This has led to a great deal of anxiety and stress among a lot of individuals. But worrying simply cannot help you in this time. Instead of thinking too much about the future, use this time to enhance your skill sets, so as to make yourself essential for your company. Enrol yourself in some online courses and take part in these courses with full dedication. Don’t consider work from home as a paid holiday, work with full dedication.

Be gentle with yourself: Don’t forget to be kind and gentle with yourself as well. Remember, this is something which none of us has ever experienced before, so you must not blame yourselves for not being prepared enough. If you are not able to learn a new skill or cook fancy dinners for your family, or if you are not as productive as your usual self, there’s no need to be harsh on yourself. If you don’t feel like doing anything, that is fine too. Relax, take rest. Remember, the lockdown could also be a chance to refresh or take a break from the normal hustle and bustle of life. If you come out of this lockdown as more energized and refreshed, consider it a success and achievement. Also, stop comparing yourself with others. Every individual is different and will be responding to the situation differently, there’s no point comparing yourself with others. Spend more time with your family. If you feel anxious or depressed there’s no harm in reaching out for help. There must be some online counseling services provided in your community, reach out to them.

February 1, 2020 HeartyPsych PsychWELLNESS

8 Ways to Overcome Sadness

We all experience sadness at some point or other in our lives. Pondering on the sad thoughts and feelings again and again, can keep people from overcoming sadness. For those who are suffering from depression or are going through an emotionally tough phase, it becomes all the more difficult to stop feeling the way they are. Sometimes, such individuals feel frustrated at why they can’t just stop feeling sad or why can’t they just snap out of their sadness. Another difficulty they face is that other people around them believe the former have control over such emotions, not realizing that a depressed or sad person doesn’t enjoy being sad or unhappy and that he himself too wants to feel good but is somehow unable to do so. It is, therefore, important for all of us to understand that emotions don’t work as simply as we expect them to; and so, you can’t just put a stop to the emotion of sadness altogether. However, what you can surely do is to pause the feelings of sadness, anxiety, guilt, anger, or feelings of being worthless for some time. Here are a few ways that can help you overcome sadness and make you feel better; these may be considered components of your first-aid kit:

1. Distract: A significant characteristic of depression is rumination. A person who is feeling sad or depressed often ruminates on negative thoughts which, in turn, increases the feelings of sadness. To get rid of the habit of ruminating, you should try to distract yourself by watching TV, reading, listening to music or anything that you find enjoyable. The idea is to keep your mind occupied.

2. Use mantra: You can design your mantra which you can recite whenever negative thoughts come to your mind. This can be a serenity prayer, an inspiring quote, or you can just simply repeat saying OM or one.

3. Physical exercise: There is ample research to prove that exercising helps uplift mood. Exercise makes your body release feel-good hormones called endorphins which help lower feelings of sadness and depression. So when you feel sad or down, go out for a walk or hit the gym.

4. Practice gratitude: Research has shown that being grateful helps increase happiness. So whenever you encounter negative thoughts, focus on the things you are grateful for. Concentrate on what you have rather than what you don’t.

5. Write down your feelings: You can make a pact with yourself that every time a negative thought comes to your mind, instead of ruminating over it you will write them down in a journal and close the book. Give outlet to your feelings without overthinking.

6. Let things take their own course: Sometimes, when you try to control things, they take control over you. So rather than trying to control each and everything, free yourself and let things take their own course. Take things as they come and as they are.

7. Read biographies: Reading biographies of inspiring people will help you learn better coping skills and will help you realize that hardships and difficulties are part of life. What matters is how you perceive and approach them. Taking hardships and difficulties as challenges will definitely change your outlook towards them and will help you deal with your situation properly.

8. Challenge your thoughts: Whenever negative thoughts creep in to your mind, challenge them. Don’t surrender to negative feelings; confront such feelings instead. You will find that most of your thoughts don’t even have any base and are just creation of your mind and imagination.

January 23, 2020January 30, 2020 HeartyPsych PsychWELLNESS

Avoid Saying This to Your Child During Exam Season

It is quite normal and understandable to be concerned about your child’s performance in his or her exams. But sometimes parental pressure and too much expectation from the children lead to stress and anxiety among them.

Have you ever thought that the phrases you so casually and unconsciously say to your child during the exam season might be disturbing your child’s composure and, in turn, adversely affecting his exam performance?

It is pertinent, therefore, to be mindful of what you say and what you must not say to your child while he is preparing for his examination. Some such sentences and phrases are given below:

1. “I expect you to get. . .”

Never use this phrase with your child. Burdening your child with your own expectations and ambitions can do more harm to your child’s mental state and his exam performance than you can even imagine. Your child would anyway perform according to his own abilities and mere pressuring and nagging him for a better result cannot guarantee it. Let your child learn about success and failure on his own, while you instill the faith in him that you will be there for him irrespective of his or her result.

What PM Narendra Modi said in Pariksha Pe Charcha-2020 is relevant in this context. He said, “Children should be pursued not pressured into studies and parents should see that they also have ample amount of time to commit to extra-curricular activities.”

Thus, more than your child, it is you who need to learn that every child has his/her own strengths. Good marks in exams is not the only and ultimate way to success, and failure is not the end of the road.

2. “Don’t you think you should be revising?”

It is not bad to keep track of your child’s progress and activities to a certain extent, but don’t let your concern for your child turn you into a helicopter parent during exam days. Your child might need some time to unwind during preparations. Don’t get too anxious the moment you see your child without a book. Allow him the time and space to replenish his stressed mind. Offer the child your help if required, but if he/she refuses, do not insist. Treat your child as a responsible individual and let him know, in a subtle way, that you trust him to make good use his time.

3. “Are you sure this is the best way to revise?

There is no single best method of preparation. Every individual has his own approach to understand and retain information. Just because your child is revising the syllabus in a way quite unlike the way you would, does not mean his discretion has to be doubted. For instance, just because your child revises the syllabus with music on, doesn’t mean his preparation would go waste entirely. Also as a parent, one should understand that the school prepares the child adequately about how to revise. Trust and allow your child the space by letting him adopt the method that works best for him. But at the same time, be ready to offer suggestions if the child feels lost and comes to you for help.

4. “It is going to be fine.”

There are certain phrases that you often say to your child for expressing support. But you might not know that they can also have an opposite effect on the child’s mind to what you intend. Exams are stressful and when your child expresses his or her anxiety, the seemingly reassuring but vague phrases like “It’s going to be fine” don’t really work. What is required, on the other hand, is that you acknowledge that it is okay to be stressful and even after the best preparation, a child can be worried about his performance in the exam. In such a time, it is essential to make the child understand that one can only do one’s best, and that’s enough. Tell him to focus on making an honest effort instead of the result.

5. “You will regret it if you don’t put any effort in!”

This is something many parents must have said, at least once, to their child during exams. Putting in an effort is definitely very important and every individual comes to learn it as he grows up. Your child is still to learn about all the brutal truths of life, which, he or she will eventually learn about, but in his/her own time. Until then, expecting him to act like an experienced bloke is not justified.

The statement “You’ll regret it if you don’t put any effort in!” would hardly serve any good purpose because “regret” is such a strong and scary word for a young mind that it would unnecessarily make the child apprehend danger and uncertainty. If you really want to help and motivate your child, try saying positive things such as, “Honest, intelligent efforts are always rewarded.”

6. “It’s going to be all over soon.”

This seemingly harmless phrase is rather a bit tricky. Saying “it’s a short period, we’ve got a holiday coming up” to a child who is too anxious about the upcoming exam, is not a bad thing but it may backfire as some children might panic thinking they are short on time. Therefore, keeping the child’s nature and possible outcome in mind, you should or should not say this to him/her. A better way to calm your anxious child is rather to talk about pleasant future scenarios without hinting at time frames.

7. “Your cousin got these grades in his/her exams. Let’s see what you get!

This is something you should never say to your child—NEVER—because not only this comparison will put undue pressure on the child to surpass his cousin but may also spoil his equation with his cousin since the child would henceforth see his/her cousin as a rival. Wanting your child to perform to the best of his abilities is understandable but comparing him with other children will only make them feel unsupported and judged. Your child might already be aware of the grades of other children around him/her. You need not overstate it. There are better ways to motivate your child than this. Already there are so many children who fear that they’ll disappoint their parents.

January 11, 2020 HeartyPsych PsychWELLNESS

7 Ways to Practice Gratitude

Being able to practice gratitude daily is a great virtue. It helps people feel emotions that are positive and healthy. People who practice gratitude get more sound sleep and are kinder and more compassionate towards others. Practicing gratitude also creates an overall feeling of contentment and makes an individual feel satisfied with life. Science has proven that it can also lead to a stronger immune system.

Learning to practice gratitude begins with the understanding that ‘gratitude’ is not something that is meant exclusively for major events in one’s life. One is naturally grateful for things that hold special place in his or her life, like getting admission in a prestigious or desired college, or getting a promotion but what one needs to learn is that he or she can be grateful for things as small as a good cup of coffee after a hard day of work as well. In fact, this is the key to practicing gratitude in daily life. Following are some simple ways to practice gratitude in daily life and reap its wonderful benefits:

1. Nothing is small: When it comes to practicing gratitude the most important thing that we must remember is that nothing is small. One should appreciate and be grateful for every good thing, whether it is the wonderful weather or getting to work on time because, as said before, gratitude is not for the big things alone. Of course inculcating this habit will take time, therefore, begin with finding one thing a day to be grateful for. While being grateful, try to be in the moment completely, notice the minute details and appreciate everything whole-heartedly and with complete conviction. Only then will you be genuinely able to understand the importance and worth of gratitude. Soon you will notice how naturally it comes to you and that there’s so much in life to be grateful for.

2. Just the right comparison: Comparing ourselves to others is quite common considering the amount of time we spend on social media these days. It is quite unavoidable even. But the key to practice gratitude is to know what kind of comparison might help you be grateful. Comparing ourselves with those who seem better will only bring misery and will only rob us of our joys. Therefore, it is imperative to stop comparing ourselves with others if we truly want to be grateful.

Focus on yourself and be thankful for what you have. And at times when you find it difficult to be grateful, look around. You will find that there are so many others who are yearning to have what you have. This will help you appreciate your blessings.

3. Practice mindfulness: Practicing gratitude requires you to be mindful of all the little things around you whose value you fail to realize and those you often take for granted. Getting to office without getting stuck in a bad traffic jam, or taking a walk on a road that is clean and green are little things that often go unnoticed because we are not in the moment. Practicing mindfulness brings gratitude easily. You will notice that by being grateful, you’ve become happier and more empathetic as well.

4. Gratitude journal: Keeping a gratitude journal is a great habit. Develop the habit to write down all the things for which you are grateful daily, no matter how big or small. Keep a journal of all the positive thoughts that you experience while being grateful. It is also a wonderful way of realizing that there is so much in the world to be grateful for. Also, on the days you find yourself miserable or sad or down, this journal will help you feel positive. Practicing gratitude does not mean that you would never feel disappointed, sad, or low. You would, but the journal will surely come handy and will help you bounce back to a happy state quickly. You can keep a daily journal or a weekly journal whichever suits you better, though starting by keeping a daily journal will better serve the purpose.

5. Help others: Helping others or doing something for others, especially without expecting anything in return, can actually boost your happiness. Research has shown that helping others can increase well-being as well. When you bring smile on somebody’s face, you are bound to experience happiness yourself. Not only that, it will also help you be grateful for being able to do something for someone else. Small acts, such as effective listening or doing somebody’s work or simply being kind to others will instantly make you feel contented and give you a positive feeling of being capable.

6. Spend time with family and friends: Spending time with loved ones will not only make your relationships stronger but it will also bring you closer to your loved ones. Knowing that you have a loving family and friends who care, can make you be more grateful and appreciative. It will also provide you opportunities where you can do something for them and practice gratitude. Hence, make it a habit to meet and spend quality time with your family and friends no matter how busy life gets.

7. Consistency is the key: It is well known that it takes 21 days to two months to form a habit. Gratitude too is a kind of habit; and the key to attain it is to remain consistent so that being grateful becomes a part of your behavioral repertoire. Soon you will realize that what required an effort earlier, has ultimately become spontaneous. Thus, even if initially it takes a little effort to look for the things to be grateful for, it will steadily become more and more effortless and spontaneous.

November 1, 2019December 16, 2019 HeartyPsych PsychWELLNESS

How to Deal with Your Child’s Tantrums

Tantrums are sudden outburst of childish rage or temper. They involve intense emotions like that of anger, loss, frustration, and disappointment which can result in a child crying loudly, throwing things, biting, kicking, or head banging. Interestingly, they are quite common among children of 1-4 years of age, and almost every child goes through them. Tantrums are actually a child’s way of dealing with an unpleasant or frustrating situation. Temper tantrums in toddlers are often a result of frustration. Since a child of 2-3 years has limited vocabulary to express how he or she is exactly feeling and often have difficulty in finding a solution to a problem that he or she encounters; this leads to a feeling of frustration and anger and is often expressed in the form of tantrums. No matter how common tantrums are, they can pose a huge challenge for parents and often cause great distress to them. However, if dealt properly tantrums can very well be prevented and managed when they happen. Knowing the reason behind your child’s tantrums can help you prevent the sudden outbursts. Some kids are naturally more prone to temper tantrums due to temperamental issues; they are more sensitive and get easily upset; also, stress, hunger, and tiredness can also lead the kids to throw tantrums. Additionally, sometimes kids find themselves in situations that are beyond their coping levels, situations that can be emotionally overwhelming. Here are a few ways to deal with and manage your child’s tantrums:

Stay calm: It may be easier said than done, to remain calm when you find yourself in the middle of your child’s emotional outburst—when he or she start crying loudly, kicking, biting, throwing things at you. You are bound to react, but the key to managing tantrums, being a parent, is remaining as calm as possible. Reacting with an angry outburst will only make the situation worse. Speak slowly in a calm composed manner. As a thumb rule, if you see your child yelling or crying loudly, speak as softly and in a voice as low as possible. Do not try to reason with child as it is very late once a tantrum has started.
Acknowledge the emotions: Very small children throwing tantrum mostly don’t know how to express their emotions and they don’t even know how to label each and every emotion they go through. When your children throw a tantrum help them acknowledge their emotions. If you see that your child is throwing tantrum as a way to express anger, tell him or her, “I know you are angry or upset.”
Allow them to choose: Most of the time a toddler throws a tantrum over things that involve a sense of control. In situations where your child wants to assert his or her own choice especially over issues such as what to eat or wear, it is better to allow your child a little bit of control. Let your child decide what he or she wants to eat or wear or which toy he or she wants to bring along. Give them a chance to decide by giving them two or more options. Don’t make a big deal out of your child’s choice of a weird food combination or if he or she decides to wear some bizarre clothing.
Appreciate good behavior: Find instances when your child behaves in a calm manner in a situation that would have normally caused a tantrum and praise your child effusively—give a pat on their back or hug. Tell him or her “you did wonderful!” This will help your child understand the behavior that is appreciated.
Maintain a routine: It is important to follow a routine. Sudden change in activity sometimes makes children upset and restless. Play-time, lunch/dinner-time, sleep, everything should follow a routine. If you are about to introduce a change in the routine activity or schedule, let your child know five to ten minutes in advance. Say for example, your child is playing, and suddenly you realize that you have guests coming in half an hour, tell your child that he/she has five minutes of more play-time left today as you are expecting guests. Also ensure, especially in case the child is a toddler, that he or she is getting appropriate rest and sleep and is well fed. Sometimes hunger, fatigue, and sleeplessness may make little kids irritable and ultimately trigger a tantrum.
Be consistent with rules: You need to establish some rules early on and follow them consistently. Rules work as a guide to what behavior is accepted and what is not.
Build emotional vocabulary: Toddlers often have limited vocabulary especially when it comes to communicating their feelings. Help them learn emotional vocabulary by finding situations where you label their emotions. You can even engage in role-play of emotions with your child to build his or her emotional vocabulary.
Whether to ignore or not: While many suggest that ignoring a tantrum will stop it. But this is a tricky matter. Imagine you are upset or feeling low and everyone around you starts ignoring you, how would you feel. Same is the case with children. A tantrum, as we know, is an emotional outburst. Suppose your child is upset because his or her sibling took away his or her favorite toy, and you, instead of addressing the issue, ignore his or her displeasure—imagine how frustrating it can be for the child. In a long run, this tactic of ignoring will not only be futile but is also going to set up a bad example as far as the child’s responsiveness to other’s plight is concerned. Your child will learn that whenever people are upset it is better to ignore them. Or, if you feel upset don’t reach out to the loved ones as they are going to ignore you. Thus, when your child throws a tantrum, it is better to go to your child, give him/her a hug and acknowledge his or her feelings.

In cases when you are not able to reach out to your child right away, wait till your child calms down and then hug the child and tell him/her that you were aware of their emotional outburst and now that they are calm, you can help them or comfort them. Most importantly, if you do feel that, in a certain situation, responding to your child’s tantrum will only encourage the child for worse, make sure, while ignoring the tantrum, that your child is safe and well within your visibility so that you can observe his or her reaction.

October 14, 2019October 21, 2019 HeartyPsych PsychWELLNESS

5 Traits of Happy People

Happiness is something we all strive to attain yet very few of us know the actual meaning of happiness. Most people think that material success—owning a big house or luxury cars, and fat bank account, great career achievements, having a family, and high social status and reputation are the things that make a person truly happy. But the truth is, true happiness has got nothing to do with these worldly things. Happiness is actually a state of mind and so, how a person perceives and reacts to life says a lot about whether he or she is on the right path to happiness or not. Here are five key traits that you should try to develop to keep yourself happy and which are typical of genuinely happy people already:

1. Live in present: Happy people focus on the present. They don’t dwell on things that have happened in past or they don’t worry about the future. They are aware that life is happening now and so they live in the moment. Research has shown that worrying too much about future is the source of anxiety and various other mental health issues, just as thinking too much about the past can be a cause of depression. Thinking too much about how things were or how they should be, rob us of our present. Happy people live in the present and make the most of it.

2. Grateful: Happy people are grateful for everything they have. Gratitude is the key to happiness. One must truly value everything that they possess in order to be happy. Being too occupied with one’s desires sometimes mislead us from the path to true happiness. Also, desiring more and more leaves us depressed and discontent; and in the process, we often forget to be thankful for the things we already have. Happy people achieve satisfaction by being grateful for everything they have and they consider themselves fortunate enough for whatever little they possess. Happy people express their gratitude on daily basis and that’s what becomes their source of happiness.

3. Optimistic: Happy people always look at the bright side. They possess a positive attitude towards life. No matter how difficult circumstances may be, they never lose their positive outlook and that’s what helps them survive difficult and challenging circumstances. They always see the glass as half full and look for the ways to fill the glass to the brim. It is the optimism that helps them stay happy and patient in difficult circumstances. Although it is not always easy to stay optimistic when things become too challenging, with practice one can certainly acquire this trait.

4. Kind: Kindness is another trait of happy people. Happy individuals are not only kind to others but to themselves as well. They build rather than destroying others. They also forgive and forget and don’t hold grudges. They find happiness in helping others. They believe in sharing and know that money spent on one’s own self does not always lead to happiness. Research too has shown that happiness or joy received from buying stuff for one’s own self is short lived or momentary. But if the money is spent on others, one gets longer-lasting and stable happiness.

5. Secure: Happy people are secure in themselves. They are confident and never compare themselves with others. They know their strengths as well as weaknesses and are comfortable with both. As they feel secure and confident in themselves, they never seek approval of others or try to please others yet they never brag. Their self-esteem is not derived from superficial things and is rather more internal. They always try to maximize their strengths and are always open to work on their weaknesses.

October 3, 2019October 3, 2019 HeartyPsych PsychWELLNESS

12 Strategies to Boost Your Memory

We all forget things once in a while. And most times we don’t even pay attention to this problem until and unless we find ourselves in a demanding situation. Memory loss is not something to be taken too lightly and we ought to make conscious efforts to improve our ability to memorize, retain, and recall information. Although there is no sure shot way to prevent dementia, certain techniques may go a long way in helping you improve your memory and increase your brain’s potential in general. Here are 12 strategies that can effectively boost your memory and help you remember and recall better:

1. Focus your attention: In order to store information in your memory storage system, you need to take interest in the information presented to you and give it your full attention. Information is more likely to get lost when you pay half attention to it. While reading or meeting people for the first time, give your full attention.

2. Visual/Imagery: While attending to the information add visual imagery to the information. We are better able to remember things that are visual. So while reading for an exam, use imagery as much as possible.

3. Associate: Associating new information with the information you already know or have can also help you better memorize new information. Associations help create more mental connections of the information which, in turn, helps in better retention of the memory of that information.

4. Chunking: This technique can help you memorize a large set of information by breaking the information into small chunks or groups. In other words, the information to be remembered is divided into small chunks or groups of information. For example, if you need to memorize a phone number- xxyyyzzxxx, you can make chunks of this number—xx/yyy/zz/xxx.

5. Get good sleep: Our brain gets to consolidate the day’s information during sleep. Consolidation is a process in which short-term memory is transferred into long-term memory. In order to improve your memory you need to get a quality sleep of 7-8 hours daily, whereas, lack of proper sleep can affect your memory negatively. That is the reason students are advised to get a good sleep before an exam.

6. Mnemonics: Use of mnemonic techniques can also help to memorize better. Mnemonics are specific techniques designed to improve recall. Like using first letters of the given information to form a word, for example using VIBGYOR to memorize the colors of rainbow.

7. Brain exercises: Just like any other muscle in the body our brain is also a kind of muscle that needs exercise to work at optimum level. In order to enhance memory, play brain games. Solving puzzles, crossword, Sudoku, and playing word-recall games etc. have been proven to boost memory.

8. Be active while learning: There is a saying that individuals remember 20 per cent of what they hear, 75 per cent of what they see, and 90 per cent of what they do. And this saying is fairly correct. Being active while learning something like movement of arms, pacing back and forth, and using gestures while learning a new information has been found to enhance memorization. So keep your body actively involved while learning.

9. Recite: Repeating something in a loud voice can help memorization of that information better. As you recite you involve another sense, i.e., hearing. This helps better anchoring of the information in your brain. You can also recite what you have learned to another person in your own simple words and language. This technique is especially effective for students.

10. Meditation: Meditation has been found to improve memory. Mediation helps lower the stress which, in turn, is known to affect memorization. Meditation has also been found to improve the gray matter in brain, which positively affects memory. Practice meditation on daily basis for healthy mind and body.

11. Exercise: Scientists have proven that daily exercise as simple as running or jogging can help in formation of new neurons in brain and can help improve memory. Exercising daily not only keeps you physically fit but it also keeps your brain fit.

12. Keep stress away: As mentioned above, too much of stress has been found to affect memorization and recall both. Chronic stress has also been found to damage brain cells, especially in hippocampus which is responsible for retrieval of old memories and formation of new memories. So in order to improve your memory you also need to keep your stress level under check.

August 28, 2019August 28, 2019 HeartyPsych PsychWELLNESS

Five Ways to Boost Your Concentration

Concentration is the ability or power of directing one’s attention to something. But we live in a world full of distractions, where we often feel overwhelmed by the ever-increasing demands from our personal and professional front. These distractions may or may not be paltry but they tend to make it difficult for us to maintain and improve concentration and do the things that really matter. Here are five ways that can help you overcome distractions and concentrate better:

1. Establish a daily routine: Creating a daily routine and sticking to it, is a great strategy to improve your concentration. Having a random routine wastes a lot of your time in just deciding upon what to do and when. But once you establish your routine, you will start doing the day’s tasks automatically. Creating a routine would save your time and energy that goes into thinking about what to do and in what order and thus helps you focus your energy and increase productivity.

2. Rank your tasks: You can improve your concentration by prioritizing your tasks and attempting the most important tasks first and leaving the smaller or comparatively less important tasks for later. While performing all the tasks together is neither realistic nor possible, thinking about all of those pending tasks can be daunting as well as overwhelming. Ranking tasks in order of merit, on the other hand, can prove to be an effective tactic for staying focused on the tasks at hand.

3. Practice Meditation and Mindfulness: Many studies have demonstrated that meditation helps reduce stress and anxiety, and improve focus. Practising meditation and mindfulness makes you aware of when your mind wanders off track and aids in bringing it back to the desired point of attention. Both meditation and mindfulness train your brain to stay attentive for longer periods of time.

4. Listen to Music: Music has a profound effect on not just your mood, but blood pressure and heart rate as well. According to a study conducted at the Stanford Cognitive and Systems Neuroscience Laboratory, listening to short symphonies engages the parts of the brain that controls an individual’s attention span, ability to make predictions, and update the event in memory. Though music boosts these brain functions and improves concentration, it’s the short period of silence between musical movements that maximizes brain activities.

5. Turn off notifications: Last but not least, the best way to improve concentration is to turn off the notifications of your personal devices. Research has shown that although a notification appears to only briefly divert your attention, it disrupts your thoughts for much longer, making it harder to bring them back on track. Irrespective of whether you interact with your cell-phone or not, checking out notifications in between can significantly impact your attention. Therefore, you should use your cell-phone judiciously and schedule some time away from the screen to be able to devote yourself single-mindedly to the tasks you do.

Also read:
Researchers Explain Neurophysiological Link Between Breathing and Attention
Step-by-Step Guide to Diaphragmatic Breathing

August 22, 2019 HeartyPsych PsychWELLNESS

How to Be an Effective Listener

One common misconception that many of us have about communication is that it is all about the ability to convey what one wants to tell. We often forget about or ignore one of the most important elements of communication, that is, LISTENING.

Listening is not only paying attention to what is being said but how it is said, the tone, the choice of words, and the body language. Believe it or not, listening is a skill, which you may or may not possess naturally but which you can definitely learn. In fact, effective listening skills are being taught these days at schools and at work settings to help ensure better understanding and better output—in short, to make communication meaningful and fruitful.

Most of us listen to respond, rather than to understand. Listening carefully to comprehend the point of view of the speaker is called active-listening. Apparently, it refers to listening to the feelings of the speaker. Active-listening or effective listening skills can help maintain healthy relationships, avoid miscommunication or misunderstandings, resolve conflicts, and find solutions to problems.

Here are few tips that can help you become an effective listener:

1. Undivided attention: Whenever someone comes to talk to you listen with your undivided attention. Listening requires giving your complete attention to the speaker. Listening while you’re busy doing something else shows that you are not actually listening. So when your child comes to you to talk about what happened at his or her school or when your spouse is talking about his/her day at work, put aside whatever you are doing for some time and give your full attention to the speaker. It is quite possible that you are genuinely busy at that time and cannot talk. The best thing to do, in that case, is to the person that you will listen to them as soon as you finish the work. Giving undivided attention conveys respect and genuine interest to the speaker.

2. Make eye contact: Maintaining healthy eye contact is crucial to effective communication process, listening is no exception. Effective listening requires maintaining eye contact with the speaker. This does not, however, mean that you have to stare constantly at the speaker and that’s why the term ‘healthy eye contact.’ Therefore, once in a while, take break and blink you eyes, or look between the eyes. Staring continuously can make the speaker feel intimidated, whereas, wandering eyes indicates lack of interest or boredom.

3. Attend to the feelings: Try to listen to not only what is being said, but how it is said, notice the nonverbal cues as well, such as the body language. This can help you understand what is actually being conveyed by the speaker.

4. Don’t judge, criticize, or start telling your own stories: Active-listening involves listening without judging the speaker and being open to what is being said. When someone asks you to listen, that means you need to put aside your own stories. Do not interrupt or criticize the teller. An active listener needs to keep his or her opinions to oneself. Don’t try to finish sentences of the speaker. Let the speaker take his or her time to complete what he or she wants to say.

5. Check for comprehension: In order to ensure that you understand what is being said, occasionally rephrase the key points. But do so when the speaker takes a pause. Do not interrupt the flow. Rephrasing helps the speaker rehear what is being said, and gives speaker a chance to clarify if required.

6. Encourage: In order to encourage the speaker to keep talking, use questions like, “what happened next?” or you can simply repeat the last words said. Another simple way is to just say “hmmm” to keep the conversation going.

Also read:
How to Master the Art of Constructive Feedback

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