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Social Media: ‘Everything You Do Is Wrong’

Source link: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/thinking-about-kids/202212/social-media-everything-you-do-is-wrong

Anxiety and defying common sense feed clicks.

“Throwing balls to your dog teaches obsessive behaviors and will cause permanent damage to their bones and joints.”

That was the last straw.

Loki, my pandemic pup, is involved in a lot of dog sports. He is a natural at FastCAT racing, we do Rally obedience, he’s training to be a therapy dog, and he can do dozens of silly pet tricks. My social media feeds are filled with posts about dogs. Most of them tell me what an awful pet owner I am.

  • You’re talking to your dog too much.
  • The popular leash you use for walks in the woods will kill your dog and cause permanent scarring.
  • Common high-end pet foods will poison your dog.

And the one that just pushed me over the edge—throwing balls to my dog will cause him irreparable harm.

Why Does Social Media Feed Fear?

I was recently interviewed by the Washington Post about parenting. Specifically, several experts, including myself, were asked about “sittervising.” Yes, it’s just what it sounds like—watching your child while sitting down instead of playing with them or obsessively following them around the playground. In other words, letting them play.

All the experts said, “Yup, good thing. Kids need some space.” The author of the piece, myself, and seemingly all of the commenters’ reaction to this new parenting trend was the same: “Well, duh.”

Yet “sittervising” hit several major newspapers and has been trending on Instagram and TikTok since August. Why?

The answer is clicks. The same reason that my feed is filled with scary warnings that perfectly normal things sensible dog owners do are dangerous.

The Stranger the Better

Think about these three headlines:

  1. Dogs need daily exercise.
  2. Feeding dogs too many treats can lead to vomiting.
  3. Throwing balls to dogs causes obsessive behavior.

Which would you click on?

Headline 1 is something you probably know—it doesn’t make you curious and it isn’t worrying, so you’re unlikely to seek more information.

Headline 2 is worrying, but not really surprising. I might click to see what they mean by “too many.” (I was surprised to read that my dog’s favorite liver treats are only supposed to be given a few at a time, several times a day. Oops.). A post on common human foods poisonous to dogs—chocolate, grapes—is more likely to get clicks.

But 3? I would definitely click. Why?

First, it annoyed me. What’s wrong with throwing balls to dogs? Dogs love balls. My dog really loves balls.

Second, it made me anxious. My dog runs over to me every afternoon, ball in mouth, ears up, looking hopefully at the door. When we get to the park, he is there, poised, ready, and eager to run. He’ll happily play catch for an hour. Is he obsessed? Is this compulsive behavior? Is this bad for him?

Third, and this is the key to the reason we see so many posts like this, throwing balls to dogs is something lots of people do. The more common the behavior—in other words, the more innocuous and seemingly safe it is—the more people are likely to click on the article. Why? Because it’s relevant to us.

If the headline read, “Dying your dog’s fur can lead to unnecessary vet bills,” most of the people who clicked would be people who dye their dogs’ fur or those considering it. That’s not a lot of folks in the world of clicks.

But if the headline read “Can bagging dog poop make you sick?” (The answer is no, by the way. Cleaning up dog feces reduces the likelihood of illness for both people and pets.) I’d click on that.

An ideal clickbait ad:

  • Catches your interest.
  • Raises your anxiety about something important to you (your pet, your child, your relationship, your finances).
  • Is highly relevant (something you do or are considering doing).

Since most responsible dog owners pick up dog waste, no one wants to get sick, and it’s kind of yucky, a post asking whether something you do several times a day is potentially dangerous is likely to be a popular post.

Parenting articles are similarly anxiety-producing. The sittervising piece was typical. It tells parents they should have been worried about letting their children play alone in their own home while they did other activities like watching TV, reading, or cooking dinner. I find it hard to believe that any parent has not engaged in sittervising.

This makes it a perfect clickable piece. It is relevant to many parents. It is anxiety-producing. And it annoys us, because we are being criticized for doing a common sense, safe, and normal behavior. Interestingly, the sittervising trend tells us that we probably were guilty for doing something that the article and experts say we should never have been guilty about. And that most of us were not guilty about.

Many parenting articles are like that. Does your child use social media? (Over 98% of U.S. adolescents do.). Worry! And find out why to worry.

Look at your own feed. Is it feeding your anxiety?

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Grounding Techniques for Managing Anxiety and Panic Attacks

Grounding techniques are some of the tactics that can come handy in managing anxiety attacks or panic attacks. These techniques can be performed by the person experiencing strong or extreme emotions or can be practiced under the supervision of a medical practitioner. These techniques have been found to relieve anxiety, panic attacks, urge for self-harm or self-mutilation, dissociation, substance abuse, and post-traumatic stressful episodes.

These techniques help a person get in touch with the present here and now experience. These techniques involve five senses which help him or her alleviate intense emotional states by using distraction and by bringing attention to the present environment.

Here are some grounding techniques that you can apply in situations where you experience intense emotional states or traumatic flashbacks. Some of these techniques use distraction, some use mental processes, and some use relaxation as a way to calm the senses:

Use five senses:

  • Find five things you can see
  • Find four things you can touch
  • Find three things you can hear
  • Find two things you can smell
  • Find one thing you can taste

The 4-7-8 x 4 technique (breathing exercise): It is simple yet powerful breathing technique developed by Dr Andrew Weil. Sit or lie down in a comfortable position, during the whole process, place your tip of your tongue lightly behind the upper teeth.

  • Inhale through your nose at the count of 4.
  • Hold your breath for the count of 7.
  • Exhale through your mouth at the count of 8, while making an audible ‘whoooosh’ sound.

Repeat the whole cycle 4 times. The 4-7-8 x 4 technique has been found to be very effective in alleviating anxiety and other intense emotional states by calming the mind, as it helps quieten the extreme and troubling thoughts.

Savor: Another grounding technique involves savoring the food or drinks as a way to bring your attention to the present. Take small bites or sips of whatever you are eating or drinking. Focus your attention on the texture, taste, smell, and flavors. Try to involve all your five senses in this experience.

Categories: Start thinking about a particular category, it could be anything like, food, places, names, etc. and then start thinking about things or items that belong to the chosen category. This technique helps by using distraction as a method to bring your attention to something else.

Focus on here and now: You can bring your attention to the present environment by focusing on here and now. You can start from stating your name, adding your age, the place where you live, date and time etc. You can also state the present situation, like where you are sitting, with whom or who else are around you. You can add just about anything.

Visualize: You can use visualization technique, where you can visualize your emotions as a volume dial and create a mental image of lowering your emotions by lowering the dial. Just like a volume dial on a radio.

Look for your strengths: You can ask yourself questions that can actually help you recognize your strengths.  This will help you acknowledge that “You did it before, you can do it now.”

Sing: Sing your favorite song or poem. You can also chant a mantra. This technique will help you distract your mind from heightened emotional states.

Positive affirmations: You can use positive and compassionate affirmations to help soothe and calm your mind. You can say them out loud or in your head, whatever feels comfortable. You can also write them down as follows:

“You are doing great, you can do it.”

“You are getting calmed down.”

Plan: You can start planning an activity that you would definitely enjoy. Like, planning a vacation or planning a house party. Focus on each and every detail, like with whom you would like to go on a vacation, packing your luggage, making bookings, etc. Or whom you would like to invite for your house party, deciding the menu, party games, preparation, etc.

Remember! These grounding techniques cannot substitute professional treatment, but these can surely aid the healing process. So do consult your mental health professional.

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What Gives Meaning to Our Lives?

Source link: https://www.psychologytoday.com/intl/blog/longing-nostalgia/202003/what-gives-meaning-our-lives?collection=1137432

New research finds a sense of “mattering” may matter more than other factors.

When we think of a crisis, we imagine a situation that is serious and urgent, imperative to address without delay. It can also be considered a turning point, such that life will never be the same again. The decisions made during a crisis will likely affect the nature and quality of life for the future. Some crises, like natural disasters or traumatic accidents, are dramatic upheavals accompanied by intense emotions. Others may be more insidious, arriving and intensifying more gradually.

In sudden events, the realization that life will change dramatically comes soon after urgent needs are met and the imminent threats have resolved. But the impact of crises that develop more gradually is often not obvious and, in some cases, is only fully appreciated with time. During either type of crisis, threats to health or safety awaken and clarify what is most important and what gives meaning to our lives.

Unfortunately, a pronounced sense of meaninglessness seems to exist among young people. In a recent survey of a representative national sample of 1,700 Americans, a majority (59%) of adults 65 years and older strongly agreed that their life has meaning, in contrast to only 36% of those 18 to 29 years old.

Are an increasing number of young adults experiencing lives empty of essential meaning? Research suggests that a sense that one’s life is meaningful is correlated with healthier behaviors, such as exercise and better diet, greater life satisfaction, and a lower incidence of depression. Conversely, a sense of emptiness of purpose or value in life has been associated with unfavorable indicators such as depression, anxiety, and suicide. The association of depression and suicidal ideation with weak assurance of meaning in life suggests that many people are experiencing a crisis of meaning. 

In The Rebel, Albert Camus argued: “If we believe in nothing, if nothing has any meaning and if we can affirm no values whatsoever, then everything is possible and nothing has any importance.”

Recent research has shed light on what constitutes a person’s sense of meaning in life (Costin & Vignoles, 2020). One prominent theory views meaning in life as comprised of three facets: coherence, purpose, and mattering.

  • Coherence refers to making sense of one’s experiences or the world at large. A high sense of coherence is the feeling that there is order to the world or that what happens to us makes sense.
  • Purpose refers to the belief that one’s life is justified by a life aim that can be pursued and a vision of how life ought to be.
  • Mattering refers to the experiences of value and worth that transcend superficial passing situations and events. Mattering means feeling that one’s behaviors make a difference and that life is worth living. More importantly, mattering refers to a person’s feeling that they matter.

The research suggests that of the three dimensions, a sense of mattering is most predictive of overall meaningfulness in life. Although further research is needed, preliminary work suggests that mattering is enhanced by rising above petty things and exclusive self-interest. Understanding our role in the broader social landscape can yield insight into the significance of our life and of our self.

Appreciating the impact we have on others, especially on those to whom we will one day pass the torch, strengthens our recognition that we and our lives matter. Most parents understand what matters most when they see their child’s spontaneous expressions of joy, need, fear, and love. What matters is even more evident in their child’s rapid growth toward independence.

The significance of one’s life is affirmed when we ponder the legacy we will leave behind in those who have been affected by us—by how we have interacted with them, by who we are, and by how we have lived and loved. The anguish we once felt over pricey purchases or fashion choices fades in the face of a loved one’s life-threatening illness or life-changing injury. Arguments over homework or practicing for music lessons become trivial when a child’s life or wellbeing is threatened.

We don’t need to wait for a crisis to know what really matters. We can remind ourselves of what really counts before we ever find ourselves in the midst of one.

The most valuable gift we can give to one another is the conviction that they matter. As noted nearly 2,000 years ago, faith, hope, and love endure, but the greatest of these is love. Faith in the coherence of life even when we can’t understand it and hope in fulfilling our purpose in life are important to our psychological wellbeing. But ultimately, feeling that one’s life is worth living flows from having been loved and from loving another. During the most difficult times, the most life-sustaining resource we can extend to another is the affirmation that they are loved.

References

Costin, V., & Vignoles, V. L.  (2020).  Meaning is about mattering:  Evaluating coherence, purpose, and existential meaning as precursors of meaning in life judgments.  Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 118, 864-884.

Ekins, E.  (2019).  Poll:  Who finds the most meaning in their lives?  Cato Institute.

Kleiman, E. M., & Beaver, J. K.  (2013).  A meaningful life is worth living:  Meaning in life as a suicide resiliency factor.  Psychiatry Research, 210, 934-939.

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A Healthy Approach To Stress — No Stress

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A Healthy Approach To Stress Different people get bothered for different reasons. A big sports game, an office presentation, deadlines at work, even other people and relationships — all these can cause us stress. This feeling of mild anxiety can cause different outcomes, even negative consequences. A student can fail his or her exam simply…

via A Healthy Approach To Stress — No Stress

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Pseudobulbar Affect

Arthur Fleck's uncontrollable laughterThose of you who have watched Joaquin Phoenix’s Oscar-winning performance in Joker, would agree that one of the most striking traits of Arthur Fleck’s character is his uncontrollable laughter. Although the movie never names the specific conditions Fleck is diagnosed with, his fits of laughter are likely based on a real disorder called pseudobulbar affect.

Pseudobulbar affect (PBA) or emotional incontinence is a condition characterized by episodes of uncontrollable laughing or crying or some other emotional displays. PBA may occur in people with neurologic disorder such as multiple sclerosis or brain injuries, or stroke. As the involuntary outbursts can last from seconds to several minutes at a time, PBA can feel extremely alienating for the person living with it. Patients may find themselves crying or laughing uncontrollably at something that is only moderately sad or funny, respectively. These laughing or crying periods not only land the patients up in uncomfortable situations, but are also exhausting and painful too. Severe symptoms of PBA can lead to embarrassment, social isolation, anxiety, and depression. The condition can be quite disruptive to the patient’s life but fortunately, it is treatable. As with any sharp shift in mood, the most important thing to do is consult a professional as soon as possible.

 

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8 Anxiety Quotes

1. To hear the phrase “our only hope” always makes one anxious, because it means that if the only hope doesn’t work, there is nothing left.

—Lemony Snicket

2. Worrying is carrying tomorrow’s load with today’s strength—carrying two days at once. It is moving into tomorrow ahead of time. Worrying doesn’t empty tomorrow of its sorrow, it empties today of its strength.

—Corrie Ten Boom

3. If you want to conquer the anxiety of life, live in the moment, live in the breath.

—Amit Ray

4. Anxiety is love’s greatest killer. It makes others feel as you might when a drowning man holds on to you. You want to save him, but you know he will strangle you with his panic.

—Anais Nin

5. Anxiety’s like a rocking chair. It gives you something to do, but it doesn’t get you very far.

—Jodi Picoult

6. Man is not worried by real problems so much as by his imagined anxieties about real problems.

—Epictetus

7. Do not let your difficulties fill you with anxiety, after all it is only in the darkest nights that stars shine more brightly.

—Ali Ibn Abi Talib

8. Our anxiety does not empty tomorrow of its sorrows, but only empties today of its strengths.

—C. H. Spurgeon

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How to Stay Positive During Lockdown

The whole world is going through an extraordinary phase. The present COVID-19 pandemic and the resulting lockdown is causing a great deal of uncertainty and doubt that might be ultimately affecting your mental health negatively. During this phase it becomes even more imperative to remain positive and take care of your mental health. Here are few ways in which you can stay positive during these trying times.

Limit your news intake: First of all you need to moderate your intake of news. There is no doubt that watching news seems to be the only way to stay updated regarding the COVID-19 pandemic. But, watching too much news can be overwhelming and can cause a good deal of stress. If you feel stressed and anxious after watching news, it’s a sign that you need to limit excessive news consumption. You can make a point to watch news only twice or thrice a day, to stay up-to-date. Moreover, it is important that you follow only authorised and reliable sources of information. It is important to stay alert but no reason to stay alarmed all the time.

Follow a routine: If you are working from home or have kids who are attending online classes, it becomes even more important that you follow a routine so that you get proper time for all the activities and don’t unnecessarily get overwhelmed with all the tasks and activities at hand. Moreover following a routine will make you feel more in control of the situation and it will help you normalize the not-so-normal circumstances that the whole world is going through. You can make a To-Do list to organize work or maintain a dairy or journal of the tasks to be completed. Allocate time to work, exercise, rest, etc judiciously.

You are not alone: Remember, that you are not alone in this, everyone is going through almost the same situation. The only difference is how everyone is responding to these circumstances and no single way can be considered perfect. Do what suits you best.

Exercise, eat healthy, and sleep well: It has become even more critical during this lockdown that you eat a healthy diet and exercise daily. As per health officials, a healthy adult is required to perform 2.5 hours of exercise per week. Exercise has been found to have various health benefits, like it helps maintain healthy cognitive functions, and helps reduce stress, anxiety, and depression by releasing feel-good hormones like endorphins. It is equally important to follow a healthy balanced diet. Avoid food that has too much fat and sugar content, avoid packed food that is filled with preservatives. Eat fresh fruits and vegetables regularly. Last but not the least, make sure you get 7-8 hours of sound sleep. Following a healthy balanced diet and exercising daily along with a sound sleep will boost your immunity and help you stay active.

Meditate: Meditation has been found to relieve stress and anxiety. It can also relieve depressive feelings. Just a few minutes spent on meditation can have a huge positive impact on you mental, physical and emotional health. Make it a point to spend few minutes daily on meditation. Find a quiet place where you can place a comfortable seat, make sure that the temperature of the room is neither too hot nor too cold, wear comfortable loose fitting clothes, and ensure the lighting of the room is not too bright. You can also add other elements like, a candle or aroma diffuser if you want. The purpose is to create a happy and comfortable space.

Practice mindfulness: Mindfulness refers to being present in the moment. Not thinking about the past or future, just being aware of the present moment non-judgementally. You can be mindful while cooking, eating, or even while sitting in your balcony. You can start practicing mindfulness by noticing things you can touch, see, and hear. Simply pause for a while and focus your attention on objects you can touch, see, and hear in your present environment. Close your eyes and take a few deep breaths. Notice how your body reacts to deep breathing. While eating or cooking, use all of your five senses to notice how the food looks, smells, tastes, and touches like. These are some of the ways you can be mindful while performing your regular activities.

Stay in touch with your family and friends: While we all are basically locked up in our homes, this does not mean that you cannot meet your family or friends virtually. Stay in touch with your family members and friends by calling them up or having a video chat. Don’t let the lockdown cause loneliness. Stay connected with people around you virtually. Man is a social animal, and therefore, keeping in touch with others is vital for your mental and emotional wellbeing.

woman wearing maskBreak the monotony: The lockdown has already put a halt on a lot of our usual activities. We all are confined to our houses, so it is natural to experience monotony in our day-to-day activities. It, therefore, becomes even more important that we do not let monotony set in. If you are spending a lot of time on Netflix or Facebook and still not feeling entertained much, or feeling rather bored, it’s time to take a break and do something else—read a book, take a walk indoor, talk with your kids or partner. You can also break the monotony by simply changing your bed-sheets, trying some new dishes, going through old family album, redecorating your house, or by organizing your forever messy wardrobe. Who said there’s a rule where you can’t dress up for home or you have to use your finest crockery only for guests. Arrange a candle light dinner for your partner or family members, dress up, use your finest crockery and have a restaurant like feel at home. You might have to compromise on food, but who cares. The point is to create memories and moments that you can cherish when the pandemic is over.

Gratitude: No matter how difficult the present situation seems, there is still plenty to be grateful for, if you look properly. When there are people who are struggling to survive in shelter homes, when people are barely getting enough to eat—in such times, if you are getting three meals a day, have roof over your head, and loved ones who care for you, you have enough to be grateful for. Think about it—on the one hand, there are frontline workers who are risking their lives to save others and on the other, there is you who can stay safe indoor. If you bring all this to your consciousness, you would definitely experience a sense of gratitude. The feeling of gratitude will, in turn, help you overcome all your stresses and worries resulting in contentment, which will bring to you peace and satisfaction.

Help your community: It has been proven that helping others makes one feel positive and capable. In whatever little ways you can, try to help your community, maybe by giving food or other essentials to the needy (while taking all the necessary precautions and maintaining a safe distance), by appreciating the healthcare and other frontline workers, or even by following the directions of the state government. You can also help you community by just being kind to each other. In these difficult times, everyone is going through a lot, so simple gesture of kindness can bring positivity not only into your life but also into the lives of others.

Don’t think about future, prepare for the future: As we all are going through this stressful phase, there must be many who are fearing possible layoff in the near future. Already a lot of companies have started downsizing their work force. This has led to a great deal of anxiety and stress among a lot of individuals. But worrying simply cannot help you in this time. Instead of thinking too much about the future, use this time to enhance your skill sets, so as to make yourself essential for your company. Enrol yourself in some online courses and take part in these courses with full dedication. Don’t consider work from home as a paid holiday, work with full dedication.

coronavirusBe gentle with yourself: Don’t forget to be kind and gentle with yourself as well. Remember, this is something which none of us has ever experienced before, so you must not blame yourselves for not being prepared enough. If you are not able to learn a new skill or cook fancy dinners for your family, or if you are not as productive as your usual self, there’s no need to be harsh on yourself. If you don’t feel like doing anything, that is fine too. Relax, take rest. Remember, the lockdown could also be a chance to refresh or take a break from the normal hustle and bustle of life. If you come out of this lockdown as more energized and refreshed, consider it a success and achievement. Also, stop comparing yourself with others. Every individual is different and will be responding to the situation differently, there’s no point comparing yourself with others. Spend more time with your family. If you feel anxious or depressed there’s no harm in reaching out for help. There must be some online counseling services provided in your community, reach out to them.

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Psychological War — DSM (Defeating Stigma Mindfully)

Times have really changed during the last couple of months. Countries all over the world are battling a viral pandemic that is not only affecting the human body, but the mind as well. The virus is causing great damage to not only the elderly but young folks with no comorbidities. More hospitals in the U.S. and Italy are seeing younger people being admitted and even intubated! This virus is causing panic and skyrocketing anxiety levels; it has become a psychological war.

via Psychological War — DSM (Defeating Stigma Mindfully)

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Anticipatory Anxiety — DSM (Defeating Stigma Mindfully)

Anticipatory anxiety is a symptom commonly found in a number of anxiety related conditions, such as generalized anxiety disorder (GAD); however, you may have anticipatory anxiety and not be suffering from GAD. Anticipatory anxiety is when you are experiencing increased levels of anxiety by thinking about an event or situation in the future…

via Anticipatory Anxiety — DSM (Defeating Stigma Mindfully)

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Avoid Saying This to Your Child During Exam Season

It is quite normal and understandable to be concerned about your child’s performance in his or her exams. But sometimes parental pressure and too much expectation from the children lead to stress and anxiety among them.

Have you ever thought that the phrases you so casually and unconsciously say to your child during the exam season might be disturbing your child’s composure and, in turn, adversely affecting his exam performance?

It is pertinent, therefore, to be mindful of what you say and what you must not say to your child while he is preparing for his examination. Some such sentences and phrases are given below:

1. “I expect you to get. . .”

Never use this phrase with your child. Burdening your child with your own expectations and ambitions can do more harm to your child’s mental state and his exam performance than you can even imagine. Your child would anyway perform according to his own abilities and mere pressuring and nagging him for a better result cannot guarantee it. Let your child learn about success and failure on his own, while you instill the faith in him that you will be there for him irrespective of his or her result.

What PM Narendra Modi said in Pariksha Pe Charcha-2020 is relevant in this context. He said, “Children should be pursued not pressured into studies and parents should see that they also have ample amount of time to commit to extra-curricular activities.”

Thus, more than your child, it is you who need to learn that every child has his/her own strengths. Good marks in exams is not the only and ultimate way to success, and failure is not the end of the road.

2. “Don’t you think you should be revising?”

It is not bad to keep track of your child’s progress and activities to a certain extent, but don’t let your concern for your child turn you into a helicopter parent during exam days. Your child might need some time to unwind during preparations. Don’t get too anxious the moment you see your child without a book. Allow him the time and space to replenish his stressed mind. Offer the child your help if required, but if he/she refuses, do not insist. Treat your child as a responsible individual and let him know, in a subtle way, that you trust him to make good use his time.

child revisinf for exam3. “Are you sure this is the best way to revise?

There is no single best method of preparation. Every individual has his own approach to understand and retain information. Just because your child is revising the syllabus in a way quite unlike the way you would, does not mean his discretion has to be doubted. For instance, just because your child revises the syllabus with music on, doesn’t mean his preparation would go waste entirely. Also as a parent, one should understand that the school prepares the child adequately about how to revise. Trust and allow your child the space by letting him adopt the method that works best for him. But at the same time, be ready to offer suggestions if the child feels lost and comes to you for help.

4. “It is going to be fine.”

There are certain phrases that you often say to your child for expressing support. But you might not know that they can also have an opposite effect on the child’s mind to what you intend. Exams are stressful and when your child expresses his or her anxiety, the seemingly reassuring but vague phrases like “It’s going to be fine” don’t really work. What is required, on the other hand, is that you acknowledge that it is okay to be stressful and even after the best preparation, a child can be worried about his performance in the exam. In such a time, it is essential to make the child understand that one can only do one’s best, and that’s enough. Tell him to focus on making an honest effort instead of the result.

5. “You will regret it if you don’t put any effort in!”

This is something many parents must have said, at least once, to their child during exams. Putting in an effort is definitely very important and every individual comes to learn it as he grows up. Your child is still to learn about all the brutal truths of life, which, he or she will eventually learn about, but in his/her own time. Until then, expecting him to act  like an  experienced bloke is not justified.

The statement “You’ll regret it if you don’t put any effort in!” would hardly serve any good purpose because “regret” is such a strong and scary word for a young mind that it would unnecessarily make the child apprehend danger and uncertainty. If you really want to help and motivate your child, try saying positive things such as, “Honest, intelligent efforts are always rewarded.”

6. “It’s going to be all over soon.”

This seemingly harmless phrase is rather a bit tricky. Saying “it’s a short period, we’ve got a holiday coming up” to a child who is too anxious about the upcoming exam, is not a bad thing but it may backfire as some children might panic thinking they are short on time. Therefore, keeping the child’s nature and possible outcome in mind, you should or should not say this to him/her. A better way to calm your anxious child is rather to talk about pleasant future scenarios without hinting at time frames.

7. “Your cousin got these grades in his/her exams. Let’s see what you get!

This is something you should never say to your child—NEVER—because not only this comparison will put undue pressure on the child to surpass his cousin but may also spoil his equation with his cousin since the child would henceforth see his/her cousin as a rival. Wanting your child to perform to the best of his abilities is understandable but comparing him with other children will only make them feel unsupported and judged. Your child might already be aware of the grades of other children around him/her. You need not overstate it. There are better ways to motivate your child than this. Already there are so many children who fear that they’ll disappoint their parents.

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Facing Your Daily Stresses And Anxieties In The Business World — Stress Management 1 dot GA

Everybody deals with anxieties and stresses in the business world. As a result, here is a list of techniques that a person can use to help manage their daily stresses and anxieties at their job and/or in the business world. Sometimes, we get stressed when everything happens all at once. When this happens, a person…

via Facing Your Daily Stresses And Anxieties In The Business World — Stress Management 1 dot GA

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Natural Meds for Anxiety? — Kenneth S. Arfa, MD

A patient asked if any herbs or supplements might help her anxiety symptoms. She worries frequently during the day and feels constantly tense. She’s not alone in seeking help from complementary and alternative medicine (CAM). According to the medical source UpToDate, one-third of patients treated in primary care use CAM. Two-thirds of American adults use […]

via Natural meds for anxiety? — Kenneth S. Arfa, MD

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Attacked By Pressure — DSM (Defeating Stigma Mindfully)

Pressure is the feeling of discomfort, worry and even fear. Many of us feel pressure on a daily basis: bills to pay, relationships to live up to, jobs to hold onto, material to study up on, expectations to maintain, etc. Pressure is a natural feeling that accompanies our everyday lives: it’s part of motivation and drive but can also be associated with anxiety and panic.

via Attacked By Pressure — DSM (Defeating Stigma Mindfully)